Seen on the lawn outside Michael Jackson's house.
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
Friday, February 20, 2009
There Goes My Hero
picture this, if you will. the final, climactic scene in varsity blues. johnny mox has got to pull through for the team. this is crucial. prayers are being said. intensity is in the air.
how many seconds are on the clock as the cougars struggle for life-changing victory?
7.
Monday, February 16, 2009
Thursday, January 15, 2009
God <3s 7
God totally loves 7.
Here are some examples.
"Bruce Almighty" was on network TV last week. Whoa. 7 MANIA! This movie boasts a WEALTH of 7.
For starters, Bruce works at Channel 7 News, doing the 7 o'clock news. When he goes to meet God (on the 7th floor), he doesn't believe that he's face-to-face with ye almighty. So Bruce asks God to tell him how many fingers he is holding up behind his back. Bruce tries to trick him by holding up 7, and then pulling a switcheroo to 5. God gives him...ehhem...7 fingers on his hand. YESSS!!! Sweet. Bruce goes on to drive a Saleen S7, have 7 encounters with that homeless guy holding up those signs, meet with God 7 times throughout the movie, and reference the 7 days of creation:
Bruce: I needed time to reassess my goals and get in touch with my true self.
Jack: You did that in a day?
Bruce: Imagine what I could do in seven...
Ok. Hold on to your butts. Here comes more evidence of God's affinity for 7.
Today there was a crazy plane crash/emergency landing in the Hudson River, which I read about online. Because I am a crazy nut who is obsessed with air disasters, I followed a link to an ABC news article called "Staying Alive During a Plane Crash" (very important). One of their main pieces of advice was to sit within 7 rows of an exit. Listen to this hot bitch Ed Galea:
"What we've found is that the average distance a survivor will travel in an evacuation is seven seat rows," says Galea, an Australian professor who has pored over interviews with 2,000 survivors of 105 plane crashes, analyzing their behavior and searching for the keys to survival.
Obviously, God allowed the creation of air travel only if those "in the know" (read: those who follow the habits of 7's magic) could sit within a safety zone should He decide to strike down an aircraft at will.
Here are some examples.
"Bruce Almighty" was on network TV last week. Whoa. 7 MANIA! This movie boasts a WEALTH of 7.
For starters, Bruce works at Channel 7 News, doing the 7 o'clock news. When he goes to meet God (on the 7th floor), he doesn't believe that he's face-to-face with ye almighty. So Bruce asks God to tell him how many fingers he is holding up behind his back. Bruce tries to trick him by holding up 7, and then pulling a switcheroo to 5. God gives him...ehhem...7 fingers on his hand. YESSS!!! Sweet. Bruce goes on to drive a Saleen S7, have 7 encounters with that homeless guy holding up those signs, meet with God 7 times throughout the movie, and reference the 7 days of creation:
Bruce: I needed time to reassess my goals and get in touch with my true self.
Jack: You did that in a day?
Bruce: Imagine what I could do in seven...
Ok. Hold on to your butts. Here comes more evidence of God's affinity for 7.
Today there was a crazy plane crash/emergency landing in the Hudson River, which I read about online. Because I am a crazy nut who is obsessed with air disasters, I followed a link to an ABC news article called "Staying Alive During a Plane Crash" (very important). One of their main pieces of advice was to sit within 7 rows of an exit. Listen to this hot bitch Ed Galea:
"What we've found is that the average distance a survivor will travel in an evacuation is seven seat rows," says Galea, an Australian professor who has pored over interviews with 2,000 survivors of 105 plane crashes, analyzing their behavior and searching for the keys to survival.
Obviously, God allowed the creation of air travel only if those "in the know" (read: those who follow the habits of 7's magic) could sit within a safety zone should He decide to strike down an aircraft at will.
Friday, January 9, 2009
Jeff Forms Criminal Minds
Jeff: i just took my gum out and put it on a stapler so i could drink cold coffee
weird
me: haha
Jeff: i don't know why i did that
me: the other day i sneezed at my desk while chewing gum and it flew out, and then i couldn't find it
i still don't know what happened to it
Jeff: HAHAHA
dying
me: i know me too
literally
i feel sick
Jeff: i'm picturing a cartoon sneeze
me: haaaaCHOOOOOO
dude did you hear phish is back
Jeff: the kind that makes you move back in your chair
haha i did
ugh
weird
me: yeah i blew back like 7 feet
did you vote yes on whatever prop it was that is gonna build the super train from LA to SF
i voted no, because it is really expensive and they didn't have a business plan
but anyway it passed
so
you know
that means we can ride it together in like 30 years
something to look forward to jeff
always look to the future
are you in a quiet mood?
Jeff: no...writing reports
er, so yes
no class is starting
no = now
me: wait...yes? or no
what kind of class is it? home ec?
Jeff: wood shop
me: are you having the birds and the bees chat today?
Jeff: i work with inmates
me: nice
do you press license plates
Jeff: mainly murders
me: wow
cold blooded killers
Jeff: just my type
me: that's hard core
do you have a spider web tatted on your elbow now
Jeff: yeah
bye
weird
me: haha
Jeff: i don't know why i did that
me: the other day i sneezed at my desk while chewing gum and it flew out, and then i couldn't find it
i still don't know what happened to it
Jeff: HAHAHA
dying
me: i know me too
literally
i feel sick
Jeff: i'm picturing a cartoon sneeze
me: haaaaCHOOOOOO
dude did you hear phish is back
Jeff: the kind that makes you move back in your chair
haha i did
ugh
weird
me: yeah i blew back like 7 feet
did you vote yes on whatever prop it was that is gonna build the super train from LA to SF
i voted no, because it is really expensive and they didn't have a business plan
but anyway it passed
so
you know
that means we can ride it together in like 30 years
something to look forward to jeff
always look to the future
are you in a quiet mood?
Jeff: no...writing reports
er, so yes
no class is starting
no = now
me: wait...yes? or no
what kind of class is it? home ec?
Jeff: wood shop
me: are you having the birds and the bees chat today?
Jeff: i work with inmates
me: nice
do you press license plates
Jeff: mainly murders
me: wow
cold blooded killers
Jeff: just my type
me: that's hard core
do you have a spider web tatted on your elbow now
Jeff: yeah
bye
Jeff Forms Young Minds
me: jeff.
who do you know who wants to move to LA?
rack your brains and butthole
Jeff: my butthole said he doesn't know
sorry
me: don't say blue angels
Jeff: hahahaa
me: what about your brains
Jeff: they were so awesome
the one that flew by at the speed of sound was so close to the water that it made a wave as it flew by
crazy
me: sweet
Jeff: class time
don't bother me
me: KIDS! LOOK AT JEFF'S COMPUTER! ASK MR. TURNER WHAT CUNNILINGUS MEANS!!!!!
who do you know who wants to move to LA?
rack your brains and butthole
Jeff: my butthole said he doesn't know
sorry
me: don't say blue angels
Jeff: hahahaa
me: what about your brains
Jeff: they were so awesome
the one that flew by at the speed of sound was so close to the water that it made a wave as it flew by
crazy
me: sweet
Jeff: class time
don't bother me
me: KIDS! LOOK AT JEFF'S COMPUTER! ASK MR. TURNER WHAT CUNNILINGUS MEANS!!!!!
Thursday, January 10, 2008
Meredith is dangerous w/ Ninja Stars
November 8th, 10:33 am
Meredith: i am a bitch at work sometimes
i can't help it
some dude just started talking to me and i totes gave him the tcfs
me: typical
to be expected
Meredith: it was because i was trying to read gossip and he interrupted
owen wilson and jessica simpson are dating
fucking groundbreaking news
who does that guy think he is trying to talk to me while i'm reading that
me: obviously he's a bitch ass
Meredith: totally
i told him so
before i told him to get lost
http://www.dlisted.com/node/17904
sorry, i know you think i'm obsessed, but come on
why is [Britney] always making that face
fart face
like she let a stinky one loose
it is ANNOYING
i HATE HER
me: stop looking at pics of her
grow up
Meredith: i can't
me: demonstrate some maturity
like me
Meredith: i have the emotional maturity of a 7 yr old
please jeff
please
me: please what? teach you the ways?
of the samurai?
Meredith: cool, ok
me: ah, samurai
Meredith: ninja stars
me: i think it would be "ninja stas"
or "ninsha stas"
Meredith: ching chong
Meredith: i am a bitch at work sometimes
i can't help it
some dude just started talking to me and i totes gave him the tcfs
me: typical
to be expected
Meredith: it was because i was trying to read gossip and he interrupted
owen wilson and jessica simpson are dating
fucking groundbreaking news
who does that guy think he is trying to talk to me while i'm reading that
me: obviously he's a bitch ass
Meredith: totally
i told him so
before i told him to get lost
http://www.dlisted.com/node/17904
sorry, i know you think i'm obsessed, but come on
why is [Britney] always making that face
fart face
like she let a stinky one loose
it is ANNOYING
i HATE HER
me: stop looking at pics of her
grow up
Meredith: i can't
me: demonstrate some maturity
like me
Meredith: i have the emotional maturity of a 7 yr old
please jeff
please
me: please what? teach you the ways?
of the samurai?
Meredith: cool, ok
me: ah, samurai
Meredith: ninja stars
me: i think it would be "ninja stas"
or "ninsha stas"
Meredith: ching chong
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